People think that I am not happy of what I am right now. Others try to talk to me and convince me to let go my excess baggage and move on. Until now I am trying to assess myself, am I not really happy? Am I in the stage of denial? I am weird and different, as I explained it before. I am quite and reserved but that’s who I am. But it doesn’t mean that I am not happy and still devastated in my life. I have to tell over and over again. Being alone doesn’t mean you’re sad and being a single is not a curse, so if I choose to stay like this for AWHILE. I think there’s nothing wrong with that. I know that I don’t have a gift of celibacy, I know that. And CHOOSING not to have a boyfriend is still sane, Yes, my past have a big factor on this. Two love, two men but same fate. And I don’t regret anything about this, in fact it made me stronger and learn so many things, one is don’t depend your happiness to anyone. Believe me. Everything is ok. Everything is fine.
I am sick and tired hearing people asking if I have a boyfriend now, what’s new with my love life and the worst thing; my aunt is worried that I might end up being an old maid. Hahahaha! I know, I know. They are just concern and they love and I love them for that but sometimes it’s getting to my nerve and I fell pressured about this. If I go home and don’t have somebody to introduce what will people think that I am not still getting over it. Come on people! But anyways, life’s like that. As long that I know myself. I know what the real score is. I am not scared.
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